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Still learning

BRISTOL, UNITED KINGDOM - FEBRUARY 24:  Primar...Image by Getty Images via @daylife
A couple of nights ago, I was skimming through my past journal entries. I find they provide me a concrete reminder of my past thoughts, challenges, and growth over the preceding years. I usually read them with an eye towards the growth that I’ve made over the years and to glean the areas in which I need to concentrate to further my, especially, spiritual growth. Because of the events discussed after the jump, my mind settled not on the area of growth but on the fragility of life and the many things that I wished to accomplish and learn before I left this world. 

After a long period of zero energy, May 2010, brought me a most welcomed gift–an upward shift in my energy level. So, it was with gusto that I took out the camera and how-to books to teach myself photography. I also fired up the Rosetta Stone Spanish computer program to finally learn the language at the level of fluency, as I’ve always intended. Further, I even created a website of my own at flavors.me. I was on a roll. 

May, 28, 2010

…To another, this day may have been viewed as most unremarkable, and in fact scarcely memorable. As I love to tell everyone who will listen, I am not like everyone else, and to me, this day is notable and will be remembered because instead of letting life pass me by, I joined in my life–with a gusto.  For the past 2-3 weeks, I’ve accomplished tasks that had gone undone, some as long as a year, but most for 3-6 months. It is irrelevant that I have been physically unable to do them, because for now the sense of accomplishment is palpable and makes me yearn for more. 

June 1, 2010

Good morning sunshine. Positive thinking is queen and I have to drop kick the negative out and welcome the positive in. I realize that I have a choice, succumb to the negative or embrace the positive where healing can and will happen. Much like Michelangelo’s belief   that “every block of stone has a statue inside it and it is the task of the sculptor to discover it,” I believe that there is a healthier “me” waiting to be set free….God look down on me and protect me tonight.

 He did. I am still here. 

On June 2, 2010, my doctor sent me to the emergency room because of increased difficulty in breathing and pains in my chest. I figured maybe pneumonia; in reality, I was diagnosed with a pulmonary embolism in each lung.http://goo.gl/Ruse. Yep, just like that, my world changed. 

I am back to pre-May energy levels, that is, not much. Yet, I find that I am learning more then ever. For starters, since the embolism, I started this blog–something that I’ve longed to do.  In fact, my “things to do” list has grown exponentially since June 2nd, and in spite of a lack of energy, I whittle away at it almost every day.  As Michelangelo so aptly put it, “I am still learning,” and that means that I am still very much alive.  Blessings and love,

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